Feedback that Fuels Well-Being: How to give and receive constructive feedback in ways that support personal growth and mental health

Performance reviews often trigger anxiety, which may explain why many people shy away from feedback. A negative experience—whether giving or receiving feedback—can overshadow its true value. However, feedback is essential for growth, learning, and long-term success. Understanding its benefits can shift your perspective, making you more open to seeking it. Likewise, learning how to frame or reframe feedback positively can transform it into a powerful tool for continuous improvement.

Why feedback is needed

Feedback is essential to learning and growth. We may not always be conscious of it, but feedback plays a vital role in building relationships, self-awareness, and continuous improvement.

1. Building Relationships

We rely on feedback in everyday conversations to adjust our messages based on verbal and nonverbal cues. For example, as we listen to another person, we use their verbal and nonverbal cues to adjust our message. We are more inclined to trust the computer expert who explains a solution in ways we can understand or the health care worker who illustrates a procedure with a 3D model.

Feedback used to gain understanding and build trust strengthens relationships. We also use other’s feedback to develop a professional image. Sociologist Erving Goffman suggests that we adjust our words and actions based on how we want others to see us. This reinforces the idea that feedback is both a social and self-reflective process, helping us refine our interactions and grow.

2. Enhancing Self-Awareness

Self-awareness acts as a form of feedback. As our self-awareness grows, we can intentionally develop better habits. For instance, greater self-awareness can help us cultivate gratitude, which in turn enhances our well-being.

External feedback—what others think about us—also shapes our actions. Advocates for normalizing mental health discussions in the workplace argue that by discussing mental health issues in the workplace we take a closer look at our own mental health and gain appreciation and empathy for the challenges others face. This shared understanding strengthens self-awareness, fosters stronger relationships, and reduces stigma. 

Leaders who encourage self-awareness reap many benefits. Studies show that people who seek feedback to increase self-awareness are more engaged, skilled at showing empathy, and have better relationships. These are all indicators of someone who is thriving.

3. Driving Improvement

Feedback is a familiar friend in learning environments. From childhood, we have relied on feedback to master reading, mathematics, and sports. A coach’s correction or an instructor’s guidance helps us improve. Feedback is crucial for continuous development in all areas of life.

The Benefits of Feedback

Feedback provides a structured way to:

• Identify strengths and weaknesses.

• Recognize areas for personal and professional development.

• Increase emotional intelligence and adaptability

How to Give Effective Feedback

Research shows that how feedback is delivered affects the impact. One study found that learners not only preferred audio feedback over text-only feedback, but audio feedback also led to higher satisfaction. Additionally, the recipient perceived that the feedback giver cared about them and their progress. Performance review practices that rely on text alone would lack the feedback for clarity, shared goal setting, or instruction needed.  

Not surprisingly, feedback helps us learn more about ourselves. When we set intentions on positive change, we will seek ways to give and receive feedback better.

Best practices for giving constructive feedback:

• Deliver it in person with detail and support – This demonstrates care and commitment.

• Allow for self-discovery – Guide individuals toward recognizing areas for improvement on their own using questions that prompt critical thinking.

• Provide frequent feedback – Regular feedback enhances engagement and increases satisfaction.

The Role of Feedback in Growth

Growth implies change. In his book Atomic Habits, James Clear emphasizes that small, consistent improvements lead to significant progress over time. Feedback fuels this process by highlighting necessary changes.

Tasha Eurich suggests that introspection and external feedback are both necessary for self-awareness. Effective feedback systems enable individuals to identify specific areas for improvement and implement lasting change.

Seeking Quality Feedback

Gallup research highlights the importance of meaningful feedback. Employees who receive constructive feedback are significantly more engaged—80% of those who received meaningful feedback reported higher engagement levels at work.

Strategies for seeking valuable feedback:

• Trust an expert – Seek mentors or professionals who can offer guidance. If you want to become a better golfer, take lessons from a pro. An expert who has had the success you seek knows what it takes to help you reach your goals.

• Be specific about your needs –If you would like feedback about your performance at work, and you have identified an area holding you back, ask two or three individuals you trust to give you feedback on your progress. For example, if you are trying to power up your language so that you sound more confident, ask a few trusted co-workers to signal when you have used a word or phrase you have identified as weak.

• Track progress over time – Routine self-assessment and reflection lead to improvement. Use tracking methods. Marathon runners track number of miles they run each day and week to ensure they are ready by race day. If you want to be known as a thought leader at work, set a goal for speaking up in meetings and track these moments.

How to Provide Constructive Feedback

Effective feedback balances support and guidance. Consider these approaches:

• Coaching Method – In fields like sports, coaches pinpoint what holds an athlete back and provide specific steps and techniques for improvement.

• Transformational Leadership Approach – Leaders who foster good habits use constructive feedback by guiding individuals through processes, allowing them to self-assess and identify areas of growth.

Feedback is essential for effective communication, learning, and relationship-building. Though we may not always be aware of its presence, we rely on it.

By embracing feedback as a tool for self-awareness and growth, individuals can create positive change in their personal and professional lives.